I Should

Dear friends,

It is now more than 20 years ago since I first started working with dog loving persons.
Over the years I have learned how to really understand dogs. How to really communicate with them.
For my clients I became the interpreter of what dogs are telling me, each time translating it in human languages. What I read in the body language of dogs is always true.
That is why it is, according to me, so easy to understand dogs.
By the way, what you read in my body language and what I read in yours is, according to me, also always true.
My work with dogs and their handlers still fascinates me because the more I teach the more I learn.
It took a while before I could understand the real meaning of some words used by humans.
Years ago I wrote about a few peculiar words in English that are being used by many clients and pupils.
Some of these words are "Sorry", "normally", "generally" and "I have to".
But the most damaging word, creating for us an enormous amount of shame and guilt, is according to me the word SHOULD.
As I keep on hearing so many people using the word SHOULD, I want to write about it again.
This violent word SHOULD, which we commonly use to evaluate ourselves, is so deeply ingrained in our consciousness that many of us would have trouble imagining how to live without it. It is the word SHOULD, as in
"I should have known better", or "I should not have done that", or "I should take more Schuessler minerals", or "I should learn how to deal with my dog", or "I should train more with my dog", or "I should give up smoking", or "I should exercise more", etc....

Most of the time when we use SHOULD, we resist learning, because SHOULD implies we have no choice. Human beings, when hearing any kind of demand, tend to resist because a demand threatens our autonomy and our strong need for choice. We have this reaction to any kind of tyranny even when it is a demand coming from the internal dictator called "SHOULD". 
Humans keep saying I SHOULD and keep resisting doing what they should, because we were not meant to be slaves. We also were not meant to succumb to dictators called "I SHOULD" or "I HAVE TO", whether this dictators live in a palace in the capital city or inside of ourselves.
"SHOULD" is a very damaging word, because when we say it, we are in effect saying "I AM WRONG". Saying "I SHOULD" we are punishing ourselves. I think we do not need more "wrongs" in our life and we do not need to punish ourselves.
What we need is to have more freedom of choice and more love in our lives.

Do you want an immediate solution?

The solution I propose is to replace "I SHOULD" with a sentence like

"IF I REALLY WANTED TO, I COULD...".

Here are some examples:

"If I really wanted to, I could take Schuessler minerals".

"If I really wanted to, I could learn how to deal with my dog."

"If I really wanted to, I could stop smoking/eating junk food/drinking too much alcohol/ taking drugs..."

Do you see how you have a choice when you use this kind of sentence instead of saying "I should"?

If you really want to do something, you can do it, or not do it.
Now it is your decision to do it or not do it.
And it will be your responsability to do it or not do it.
Try it out.
You will soon see how it positively influences your life and the life of your dog.

From Bruno with love.

Recommended reading
"Nonviolent Communication. A language of life" by Marshall B. Rosenberg
"You can heal your life" by Louise L. Hay

Let's walk in Orba on 03.02.2013

Dear friends,

This is a picture I like very much.
The rooster in the picture is not afraid to show his pack how to cross the ditch.
How many times have you heard me talking about being the pack leader for your dog?
At least hundreds of times.
Teaching is repeating and rest assured that I am more than willing to keep on repeating this "mantra".
A few days ago I visited clients who were, as so many others, complaining about their new young dog who is "molesting" the children and jumping on the sofa.
The husband asked me: "How can I prevent the dog jumping on the sofa?".
Most people cannot see the difference between a symptom and the cause.
The symptom is that a young dog jumps on the sofa.
The cause of the jumping is that my clients do not know how to behave like pack leaders.
In the Sunday Times I read how a maximum of 5 % of us are able to be a leader.
But of course more than 5 % of our population has dogs.
Look at this dilemma in a positive way.
Your dog is offering you the opportunity to develop your leadership qualities.
Is there a better way to learn how to do this than during my dog walking CLASSES?
Personally I hated school, but I loved the university.
I also love walking with you and your dogs.

This coming Sunday we will do an easy, flat walk on tarmac in the Orba valley.
If you know where the parking lot of the Orba cemetery is, I invite you to wait for me there on Sunday 03.02 2013 at about 10.15. If you do not know where the Orba cemetery is, come to our usual meeting place in Jalón/Xaló behind the library. I will be there at 9.45 and leave at 10.00.

Liebe Freunde aus Deutschland und Schweiz.

Diesen kommenden Sonntag 03.02.2013 schlage ich einen Spaziergang in Orba vor. Wissen sie wo Orba's Friedhof ist?
OK, ich bin dort um etwa 10.15.
Wissen sie nicht wo Orba's Friedhof ist, keine Angst, denn wir treffen uns einfach, wie immer an der Bibliothek in Jalón/Xaló wo ich auf sie warte von 9.45 bis 10.00.
Leider bin ich zu faul um was ich oben geschrieben habe auch noch auf Deutsch zu uebersetzen. Es ist schon spaet am Abend. Ich weiss das sie daran interessiert sind zu lernen wie wir uns als Rudelfuehrer verhalten koennen. Warte ein bischen und ich erzaehle alles am kommenden Sonntag.

Tschuess.

Un abrazo de Bruno

Calm assertive energy on 27.01.2013

Dear friends/Liebe Freunde,

From our friend Carmen I received the following fascinating message.

Guten Abend Bruno
der Walk heute mit John war super, hat mir gut gefallen, sogar das Wetter hat mitgespielt.
Wir waren total 7 Personen.
Denke Du hattest auch einen speziellen Tag.
Persönlich hatte ich jedoch das Gefühl, dass unsere Hunde deine Abwesenheit wahrgenommen haben.
Sie haben versucht zu sehen wo die Grenzen ohne deine Anwesenheit liegen.
Nicht nur mein Hund, hat das *Gehorchen* auf Komando versucht zu ignorieren......*smile*
Mir sind dann deine Worte in den Sinn gekommen *nicht aufgeben*
Ich bin nächsten Sonntag und am 1.2. Auswärts und kann leider erst danach wieder teilnehmen.
Meinem Hund und auch Mir werden diese beiden Ausflüge fehlen.
Lass Alle von mir grüssen
Bis bald, Carmen

Those who have known me for a while will remember that I often talk about "energy". This is exactly what Carmen is writing about.
When I visit clients for the first time, they very often say things like "our dog is behaving differently". My answer is then: "It is because I am here and your dog is sensing my energy".

The same happens with Cesar Millan whose books and newsletters I like reading.
So many times I see the similarities between his experiences and mine.
Just to give you an example I am quoting from one of his newsletters wherein he writes about a powerful experience he witnessed during one of his book signing sessions:

"While I was taking questions from the people who had come to see me, a sudden, very powerful and very real moment intruded. One of the women in the audience broke down and started sobbing. I wasn’t sure what was happening as one of my human pack consoled her. Then, the woman finally said, “I just realized the problem isn’t my dog. It’s me.”
You’ve probably heard me say many times that I rehabilitate dogs and I train people, but it is amazing sometimes how long it takes for this simple truth to click with people. If you aren’t providing calm, assertive leadership then your dog will not follow you."

Read the complete newsletter from Cesar Millan on: http://www.cesarsway.com/news-and-events/cesars-blog/It-Isnt-Always-About-the-Dog?utm_source=BlueHornet&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Jan13NL_3#ixzz2IdCHZJcb


Here is what our friend John wrote about the walk of last Sunday:

Hi Bruno,

I hope you had a great weekend in spite of the weather.

A small group today just myself, Anna, Carmen, Michelle and her daughter in law, Monica and Fritz. No photos, as we did a repeat of the walk around Xaló where we start beneath the (West) bridge over the river and finish going past your villa. We came back via the road rather than the barranco, as I was concerned about Monica’s knees. I think she will be contacting you about how rough the terrain might be on next Sunday’s walk.

Advance notice: Anna and I will be in England, Sunday 3^rd Feb.

Regards

John
Yes John, the trip to Madrid was awesome not only because of the cold and the wind, but also because it is always very nice for me to see all the Spanish friends I have there. More and more schools of martial arts are affiliating with the Zen Okinawa karatedo kobudo of Maestro Miguel Gomez. Why are they doing it? According to me because he is such a great martial artist in domains like karate Shito Ryu after Mabuni, kobudo after Matayoshi, Shiatsu, Kyusho and Chinese medicine. It feels like he is a brother to me.

Me personally, I am really looking forward to the next walk with you all.
My suggestion for Sunday 27.01.2013 is to do a walk in Parcent. We will start from the parking lot of the restaurant called Tra Monti, where we will leave the cars. After the walk we can have a drink or preferably stay for lunch in the restaurant.
If you do not know where that restaurant is, do not worry as I will be waiting for you at 9.45 for 10.00 on the parking lot of the library in Jalon/Xalo. For those who know Tra Monti, you do not have to come to Jalon first, as we will meet you there round about 10.15.

Ich freue mich schon auf den Ausflug von Sonntag 27.01.2013 in Parcent. Unser Spaziergang fangt an auf dem Parkplatz des Restaurants Tra Monti. Nachdem koennen wir dort etwas trinken oder besser noch sogar zusammen etwas essen.
Fals sie nicht wissen wo Tra Monti ist, warte ich auf sie um 9.45 fuer 10.00 bei der Bibliothek in Jalon. Sie brauchen ebenfalls nicht erst nach Jalon zu kommen wenn sie wissen wo Tra Monti sich befindet, weil wir werden da eintreffen um etwa 10.15.

LieGrue
Love and blessings from Bruno

Walking with/Ausflug mit John 20.01.2013

Dear Friends,

We all enjoyed walking to and through the tunnel in the Barranco del Infierno in the Vall del Laguar. For the first time Carmen, Monika and Fritz accompanied us with their dogs.
Many thanks to John  for making two very nice pictures of happy dogs and happy dog handlers.

This coming (Saturday and) Sunday 20.01.2013 I will take part in a course of kobudo in Madrid at the Zen Okinawa Karate-do Kobudo school of maestro Miguel Gomez.
But do not worry about your Sunday-morning walk.
Our friend John has agreed to be your leader this time, just like Marleen has done several times in the past. He will be waiting for you at 9.45 for 10.00 behind the library in Jalón/Xaló.

As far as Sunday 27.01.2013 is concerned, my proposal is to do a walk in Parcent, starting from the parking lot in front of the restaurant Tra Monti. My suggestion is to stay together for lunch in the same restaurant after the walk, as Tra Monti have a nice south facing terrace.
Agreed?

Liebe Freunde,

Vergangenem Sonntag war es ein Vergnuegen zum ersten Mal zusammen mit Carmen, Monika und Fritz und ihre Hunde zu spazieren.
Vielen Dank John  fuer deine zwei Lichtbilder von glueckliche Hunde und glueckliche Bezugspersonen.

Diesen kommenden (Samstag und) Sonntag 20.01.2013 nehme ich teil an ein Kobudo Kurs der Schule Zen Okinawa Karate-do Kobudo unter der Leitung vom Meister Miguel Gomez in Madrid.
Aber keine Angst.
Unser Freund John hat sich bereit erklaert diesmal ihr Wanderfuehrer zu sein. Er wartet auf sie um 9.45 bis 10.00 auf dem Parkplatz der Bibliothek in Jalón/Xaló.

Was Sonntag 27.01.2013 betrifft schlage ich ein Ausflug nach Parcent vor, wo wir nach unserer Wanderung im Restaurant Tra Monti zusammen von ein gutes Mittagessen geniessen koennen.
Einverstanden?

LieGrue von Bruno

Kindest regards from Brunothedoglistener.

Teaching humans how to behave around canines.
http://www.brunodogs.com
brunoswalkscaminatas.blogspot.com
690 19 29 76

Walking in Benigembla

Dear friends,

On Sunday 06.01.2013, Los Reyes del año 2013, I took the opportunity to show my friends Elizabeth, Michelle, Anna and John one of the juwels from my personal treasure chest of walks.
It is the walk in Benigembla, the small village alongside the road leading from Jalon to Castell de Castells.After the walk we went for a drink in bar Bon Aire where it was almost too hot in the sun.
Look for the difference between the man with and the man without a hat.

Un abrazo de Bruno

Food Container for dogs?

Ever used a food container for your dogs?
What I am talking about is a big box you can fill with dried food. At the bottom is an opening and while your dog is eating, more food will flow automatically into the bowl.
Let me ask you another question: "When do you think someone calls me for advice?"
Certainly not when the caller 's dog became European champion in obedience trials.
Most people call me saying something like "my dog needs some training".
According to me there is a lot of truth in the Spanish saying "El perro es el reflejo del dueño/a", meaning in English that the dog is the reflection of the owner.
What is being reflected by the dog?
The dog will reflect the energy and the behaviour of the humans (s)he is living with.
It is my conviction that dogs do not need traini You do not eat from the containerng in the first place. Before you can train a dog, you need to understand correctly what the dog is telling you with her/his body language and behaviour.
As soon as you have a system in place enabling you to correctly communicate with your dog, then you can start educating your pet. And what are we aiming at? The target of our education is that the dog pays attention to us when we ask for her/his attention.
One of the best tools during this educational process is my feeding ritual, as I have explained it in my former letters numbers 13,14,15,16. Feeding your dog allows you to behave like the leader of the pack.
But how can you use my feeding ritual if you do not feed your dog yourself?
How will you get the dog's attention if not you but a container is educating the dog?
Yes, the container is educating the dog.
In order to understand what I mean, let's think dog.
A dog is a (descendant of a) canine predator. If there is food available for the pack it is the result of a chase and a kill of the prey. After the kill the pack will eat according to rules that reflect the pecking order. If your dog eats from a container, without you being present, it is my conviction that (s)he will experience this as a confirmation of her/his position as pack leader.
Taking that position of the leader will be more difficult for you than if you would feed your dog yourself.
No wonder I see food containers being used by people whose dogs are not paying attention to them.

Kindest regards from Brunothedoglistener

00.34.690.19.29.76
www.brunodogs.com

13.05.2012 Start of Dog Walking CLASSES

Dog walking CLASSES

Since 1995 I have been teaching dog lovers on the Costa Blanca how to behave correctly with their pets.
Classes sometimes took place in my own training grounds but also in a bull ring, on a football field, in the garden of friends or on a cricket field.
During all those years I had the pleasure of meeting hundreds of dogs and showing their carers how to behave as pack leaders.
On Sunday 13.05.2012 I start with a new combination of dog walking and dog training CLASSES. Price per CLASS/walk will only be the modest sum of 5 €. You will be able to learn how to clearly communicate with your pet and at the same time discover how to walk with a pack of dogs.
I am looking forward to meet dog lovers who are hungry to learn more about their dogs than they ever thought was possible. While learning how to observe your dog, you will discover what this beautiful animal is really telling you with her/his body language.
Starting on 13.05.2012 we will meet every Sunday morning at 10.00 on the parking lot behind the library/social centre in Xaló/Jalón. The library is the smaller building adjacent to the much bigger complex of the sports centre, located at the entrance of the village arriving from Lliber. As both are located alongside the river Xaló/Jalón we can easily combine exercising with walking in a traffic free area.

See you there.

Kindest regards from Brunothedoglistener.
Listen. Learn. Lead
http://www.brunodogs.co.za
brunoswalkscaminatas.blogspot.com
690 19 29 76